Hanging out with my good friend D always guarantees we both have an absolute blast. We first met in 2009 during S's birthday at House but he was way too inebriated (as usual) to remember a darn thing. Then we met again in Butter sometime last year during some random party and he was drunk (again) so he clearly didn't remember what he said to me the night before when I reminded him the next morning.

A typical conversation between us would go like this:

Me : You know, you said XYZ last night ... hahaha hilarious
D : No waaaaaaay, I said no such thing!
Me : You did too! You said XYZ etc
D : Ohhhhh yes now that you mention it, that does sound like something I would say ...

Anyway we were at Din Tai Fung and talking about love over xiao long baos. Not just any random many splendoured rose tinted soppy kind of love, but more specifically the five languages of love. We both agreed gifts were a terrible idea. D and I are both horrible people to buy gifts for, because we're both so darn picky and specific in the stuff we like, and would have no qualms throwing/giving them away instead of leaving them to take up space or collect dust. The only exception we have towards gifts is if they are books or holidays, because they are kinda like experiences in their own ways. One would have to know the other pretty damn well to give a book that the other person would like, or if they even liked reading in the first place.

I gave V Paulo Coelho's The Alchemist for her birthday and she loved it. I gave M Essays in Love by Alain de Botton and he loved it so much he gave me two books he loved in return (which I unfortunately found terribly pedantic and dry). Exchanging books is like timidly sharing a piece of one's heart, mind and soul, hoping for reciprocation in kind. But like in love, one does get terribly disappointed when one doesn't get a book / gift one had hoped to receive, often resulting in doubt in the giver (how well does he/she know me??) and ourselves (is this how we come across??).


I say stick to the other four : quality time, physical touch, acts of service and words of affirmation.